Ek Tha Tiger review: Eminently forgettable

Yikes. No no, they aren’t your grandparents though they’re behaving like some bygone-era pair of lovers oohing over a pair of swans, aahing over a shower of meteors and he-he’ing over corny stuff like, “If you’re called Zee, just call me Doordarshan.” called Zee, just call me Doordarshan.”

The Really, the romancing technique out here is so oudated that you want to buy the couple tickets to Jism 2 or The Really, the romancing technique out here is so oudated that you want to buy the couple tickets to Jism 2 or eg Really, the romancing technique out here is so oudated that you want to buy the couple tickets to Jism 2 or eg whatever’s still showing at the ‘plexes eg whatever’s still showing at the ‘plexes Truly when director Kabir Khan’s Ek Tha Tiger checks into exotic hotels with his Tigress, you don’t even see them ordering a spinach sandwich over room service. They camp in the lobby perhaps. Result: This has to be the most sanitised spy versus spy thingy to appear from the Bollytown, making yesteryear’s Farz seem so much more entertaining. name given to dogs?”

Wow bow, such self-deprecation. Indeed, the New Age Bourne/Bourne has been so badly scripted –non-story by producer Aditya Chopra – that it’s a wonder that Salman Khan, on a winning streak nowadays, actually conceded to participate in a project which is like a dry dosa without the masala. Anyone could have stepped into the shoes of the Stunt Wonder required here, but then of course the Yash Raj banner wouldn’t have succeeded in encashing on the current Khan here, but then of course the Yash Raj banner wouldn’t have succeeded in encashing on the current Khan Tot mania Tot mania Well, quickie ticket sales over the first weekend is all that counts, doesn’t it?

Never mind the drubbing the through the talkie portions, waking up for the action outbursts, and then zzzz all over again through the plot which is patently pointless Okay, so you’re informed that India’s RAW and Pakistan’s ISI are at daggers drawn, despite frequent peace conclaves. The agencies’ names are dropped as if it were a video game. Tiger (You Know Who) is assigned to‘observe’ the movements of a Dublin University’s professor (Roshan Seth, trying hard to bicycle), a butter soft task which is made even more buttery by the appearance of Zoya aka Zee (Katrina Kaif). task which is made even more buttery by the appearance of Zoya aka Zee (Katrina Kaif). hell’s bells, so our hero aims a revolver at her desp.

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