Kaveetaa Kaul

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In response to the present circus underway named ‘Election’, sharing a few well deserved laughs!! No offense meant..purely in jest.

Application Form for “Lok Sabha Election”
1. Name of Candidate: _____________________

2. Present Address:
(i.)Name of Jail: _____________________
(ii.)Cell Number: _____________________

3. Political Party: _____________________

*List ONLY the Last Five parties in Chronological Order

4. Sex: [ ]
A- Male
B- Female
C- Mayawati
D- Uma Bharathi

5. Nationality: [ ]
A- Italian
B- Indian

6. Reasons for leaving last party (circle one or more)
A- Defected
B- Expelled
C- Bought out
D- None of above
E- All of above

7. Reasons for contesting elections (circle one or more)
A- To make money
B- To escape court trial
C- To grossly misuse power
D- To serve the public
E- I have no clue

(If you choose “D, attach Certificate of Sanity from a Recognized Government Psychiatrist)

8. How many years of public service experience do you possess?
A- 1-2 yrs
B- 2-6yrs
C- 6-15yrs
D- 15+yrs

9. Give details of any criminal cases pending against you (Use as many Additional Sheets as you want)

10.How many years have you spent in Jail? [ ]
(Do not confuse with question 8 )
A- 1-2 years
B- 2-6 years
C- 6-15 years
D- 15+years
11.Are you involved in any financial scams? [ ]
A- Why not
B- Of Course
C- Definitely
D- I deny it all
E- I see a foreign hand.

12. What is your Annual Corruption Income? [ ]
A- 100-500 Crores
B- 500-1000 Crores
C- Overflow…
(Convert all your $ earning from Hawala etc to Rupees)

13. Do you have any developmental plans for India in mind? [ ]
A- No
B- No
C- No
D- No

14.Describe your achievements in space provided:
[_________]