TELE SCOPETruth or dare link-
Shailaja BajpaiPosted online: Tuesday, July 15, 2008 at 0104 hrs Print EmailS&M game shows,
The girl wears a dress so mini, she couldn’t sit on it; a smile so evil it stretches into a grimace; her hand carries a black belt, her words the menace of fearful retribution; “Ok, you dumb, f..,ass…, are you ready?” The two men in front of her eye the belt with sado-masochistic pleasure. “Yes, yes…”

They bend over, mouths open, teeth bare to ensnare chocolates from a vessel crawling with cockroaches. The mini lady cracks the belt and whips out: “C’mon you d…f…a… (or a juicier equivalent!), you losers — can’t you do better than that?” Eventually, time is up and the loser gets a special treat (fish oil as mouthwash) from a guy who conforms to the worst possible stereotype of a gay man (flutter eyelashes, hands, speak with lip perpetually pursed, at a high pitch and walk as though ants were crawling all over you): The winner gets a spanking sum of Rs 50,000 for challenging cockroaches and enjoying the lady’s tongue lashings.

This is Dadagiri on Bindass, where you are paid to be the whipping boy. Each challenge is more revolting than the previous one — last week Aaron and Balraj were ordered to drink raw eggs (“enjoying it, na?”, gloated the whipper-snapper) while the loser had to shove his face into a bowl of…you really don’t want to know. And you thought reality talent shows were degrading, aggressive, offensive and insensitive?

Rakhi Sawant may strike you as perfect for Dadagiri but she’s striking a new pose now. On her talk show on Zoom, she uses her tongue to great effect on hapless guests. Her first victim was Aamir Khan, whom she greeted with effusive indulgence of the kind normally restricted to one’s pets (“My darling, I like you so much!”). Aamir seemed to enjoy her tongue in cheek conversation eshtyle — “tell me, who is your dost, who is your dushman in the industry?”, to which Aamir replied with a face straighter than his backbone, “I have only friends…Salman, Shah Rukh, Saif.”

Sawant was less brazen, more boisterous than expected, although her gold dress was as ineffective as ever in covering her body. Some things must never change. — otherwise, why watch Rakhi Sawant?

Speaking of Aamir Khan, his lofty disdain of the media has slipped somewhat. Once so shy of the mainstream media that we saw him only in his films, he now appears more often than SRK on TV. It’s true. He’s on a trillion ads and when his production of Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na hit the screen, he was on every news channel in every language (seen hugging AB in a somewhat uncomfortable embrace given the difference in stature, sorry height!), besides taking Dus Ka Dam (Sony) in his stride alongside dost, Salman Khan. And, then, he sent M.S. Dhoni televised greetings on his birthday. Next he’ll be game for a show of his own — wouldn’t that be fantabulous? The three Ks in competition against each other and all of them pitted against the K serials?

A melodrama of another kind has begun with the return of Sa Re Ga Ma Pa (Zee). There’s Asha Bhonsle whose voice is beautiful enough for her not to need make-up on her face (someone tell her, please) and other judges including Himesh Reshamiyya wearing hair which grows faster than anybody else’s — that, or he’s donned a wig — and an expression that says he’s going to disagree with Asha ji — and everyone else.

Lastly, NDTV’s We The People did some serious introspection on behalf of the media for its coverage of the Arushi-Hemraj murders. The discussion went everywhere and reflected all points of view. The verdict? Don’t paint all the media with the same brush but act against those who erred. Good, except that Ashutosh of IBN-7 and lawyer Harish Salve shouted so loudly that you worried the TV studio might burst like a balloon.

shailaja.bajpai@expressindia.com