A request to NG Members …
Every critic is biased. But the official critics from the film industry are biased according to the power politics & “Who’s who?” of the industry. The unofficial amatuer critics as we can call ourselves are here to present our unbiased theory about films and filmstars. Yes, we have our own preferences and prejudices. And this makes each one of us unique. So, thus site is to express these differences and gain knowledge.
What do we do with the knowledge gained? I dunno. But its great to read the writings of an intellectual genius who persuasively presents arguments that there could be creative shallowness behind well conceived scripts like “Chak De India”. All you see in other movie forums are knowledge deficiency and fanatic obsession on celebrities. These cannot satisfy our needs of critical analysis. Which is why this site works.
But today I was shocked to see huge pics of a female clad in lingerie. To top it all, Open (labelled as Progressive) comments about personal sexual preferences. This site as far as I understand is not meant to undertake any kind of discussion on X rated topics.
The blame can be put against the retarted Indian mentality for matters Indians are trained to think as “Private and taboo”. Appears as if only Indian women are still conservative about these topics. This is a request on behalf of all such female members of this site …
We are here to discuss movies and unavoidably about Stars. Guys have the freedom to send links to each other and keep their discussion in private chats and personal mailboxes. Please don’t let the standard of this site stoop to the levels of a Porn site.
Comment by flora on 19 October 2007:
i agree and i am a boy/guy.I am just annoyed by all those pop ups ads that i just skipped the article.
Comment by flora on 19 October 2007:
but chalta hai
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
I agree Nithya…and I wasn’t very impressed by many of the comments in that thread too. Not that it’s wrong, lewd talk is fine by me..I do it too ;)…but this ain’t the place for it. Kudos to you for being so upfront about this.
Comment by flora on 19 October 2007:
good point,will get many comments for this.
Comment by nithi_s on 19 October 2007:
Sunny,
Good that we agree once again.
I don’t think some guys can stop making lewd or sexist remarks here in there. But atleast they should aviod direct posts like that one.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
flora–guy!? Change it to fauna right away
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
Though I do not exactly have very delicate sensibilities when it comes to these matters, I have to agree with Nithya and Sunny here that some of these some posts are getting increasingly vulgar and cheap.
By all means, let’s have a dash of Rajen’s sexual innuendoes to spice up things on the forum but to have an entire post, dissecting a woman’s body parts is a bit tasteless if you ask me. I’m no one to take a moral stand here and wouldn’t, but just feel NG is not the right place for it. But as I said, those clever innuendoes can continue. I love them!
Comment by rks on 19 October 2007:
Nice to have this subject in discussion.
Personally I don’t like posting those snaps but I don’t find anything wrong when someone posts them.
But I sure don’t like the discussion which follows the post.
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Personally the post itself was “filmi” related, and I didn’t have any problems with it myself at all what so ever ! In the past we’ve had MAXIM photos of Amisha, Kareena and Mallika Khan posted on NG and again I didn’t find anything wrong in those either…Amisha Patel’s MAXIM photos has had 25, 818 views and ranks as the third most viewed post on Naachgaana..speaks for itself.
There is a thin line between a magazine like MAXIM, FHM, RALPH, ZOO, and many others and a “porn” one as such.
I do admit some of the comments in the discussion that followed weren’t suitable, though in this instance they were there to evoke humor and nothing more.
A.Shah
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
rks/akshay–yeah, I absolutely agree..nothing wrong if hamein apni aankhen sekne ko mil jaaye
but some comments were clearly inappropriate. I mean words like ‘r**di’..’l**d’ etc just doesn’t put us in a very good light. I personally know many people who visit NG almost everyday and have very high regards for the writing of almost everybody here. I wouldn’t want them to start comparing NG with some other Filmy forums out there which have members throwing MCs BCs at each other and talking about the ‘g**nd’ or ‘c***t’ of certain actors or actresses. Again, it’s not a moral stand..as I said earlier, I’m all for lewd talk,in fact I was ragged into making and composing a porn song on my female batchmates by my seniors during my MBA days..you’ll be shocked!!! to hear it 
…but this ain’t the place. That’s all Nithya was trying to say I guess.
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Like I said above Sunnybhai , I do agree that the comments that followed weren’t suitable, though certainly hilarious, but that should indeed be toned down and the language used perhaps toned down a little.
However I don’t have a problem at all with the pictures posted nor do I consider them offensive or rude, ofcourse this is a biased opinion of a “guy” but still, this is FAR from porn, it’s photo’s from a Men’s magazine of a Bollywood actress…..no different from the Amisha, Kareena Maxim pics IMO Bhai:-)
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
The more I read of Sunny, the more I get impressed!
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
” I mean words like ‘r**di’..’l**d’ etc just doesn’t put us in a very good light. I personally know many people who visit NG almost everyday and have very high regards for the writing of almost everybody here. I wouldn’t want them to start comparing NG with some other Filmy forums out there which have members throwing MCs BCs at each other and talking about the ‘g**nd’ or ‘c***t’ of certain actors or actresses.”
Wholeheartedly agree!
Comment by rks on 19 October 2007:
Sunny: I am envious of you
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Akshay–bhai, I have not made a single statement against the posting of those pics..I quite liked them ..as any man would(yeah, I do like to believe I’m one). And of course, this is not PORN..I have seen more than my fair share(or anyone’s share for that matter) of that to believe this is porn
. Aap bewajah hi mere pe gussa ho rahe ho 
Sandhya–after thinking for about 88 seconds I still couldn’t find anything to reply
. So..I must request you not to do this again..I’m easily embarrased, and I’m terrible at handling praise..moreso..when it comes from one of the fairer lot.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
rks–Jiju getting envious of his Saala, now that’s a first
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
“..moreso..when it comes from one of the fairer lot.”
I’m confused now. Do you mean from the fairer sex or a fairer person? lol
Comment by nithi_s on 19 October 2007:
Akshay Shah,
I suggest posting links of MAXIM postures rather than actually pasting them in the site. Those who do not find it objectionable can visit it.
In this case, the comments were not to evoke to humour. I was some kind of explicit expression of each other’s sexist comment on what this womens seemed to have said.
I do not see any fun in such talks particularly when something about a female is involved.
And I find the kind of words men use to curse each other rather strange. Its mostly related to gayness and matters like that. Surely, you guys must find better ways to attack each other.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Sandhya–fairer, and might I add better, in every way actually…except for Math
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Nithya seems to be in a male bashing mood today…run for cover guys!
Comment by nithi_s on 19 October 2007:
Sorry about that Sunny! But, I have to say. Remember, that fight between SP and Akshay Shah in some post .. . I think it was about Ranbir and Gayness … weird topic and weider discussion.
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Sunny: Gussa? Lol far from it..it’s a long weekend over here..even if someone tried their best they couldn’t get me angry this weekend:-)
I’m not gussa at all, perhaps I did misunderstand you initially, but you’ve explained yourself perfectly clearly now:-)
“I have seen more than my fair share”–Lol!!! Ab kya bolu aap se..aap to guru nikle!:P
Nithi: Another way would be to have it clearly written in the title MAXIM PICTURES, and then have the actual pictures pasted WITHIN the post itself. That way people who do not want to see the pics simply don’t click on it as they won’t appear until you’re in the post:-)
As for the comments in the post, I do agree that some of them may come across as quiet offensive, however knowing what Jason Todd is like I can assure you it was nothing more than a bit of “silly male bonding”. And I do agree with ya..us guys are pretty weird at times:-)
A.Shah
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
‘I suggest posting links of MAXIM postures rather than actually pasting them in the site. Those who do not find it objectionable can visit it.’
Fair point….
Rajen you maybe out of a job soon.
There is of course a fine line, but also that fine line depends on individual sensibilities. For example Sherlyn Chopra’s comments actually were very enlightening for me, not in a pervy sense but she was very outspoken - more so than I’d ever have thought. Its not exactly the best place to have full blown pages with actresses flaunting and a link is a better solution. But IMO the interview, though quite graphic, is enlightening. For me, she breaks a stereotypical notion I have definitely grown up on that from my interaction with indian females this kind of talk is a very uncomfortable discussion/situation whereas she is quite open about a few things. The stuff she is saying is stuff I’ve heard from loads of non indian women but never an indian woman. Anyway just my experience, hence the surprise at the interview !
I am glad we have more females on NG now, the men can be put in their place now !
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
And the “F” word from Streets mouth is expected, he has a limited vocabulary which starts and finishes with the “F” word:-) And I must add, in this case Sherlyn Chopra’s interview itself is more “offensive” than anything commented on my NGer’s!:-)
A.Shah
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
” And I do agree with ya..us guys are pretty weird at times:-)”..LOL..yeah we are.
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Jay: I agree, I actually found her interview quiet fascinating, pervertness aside! She’s no doubt very outspoken and I see exactly where you’re coming from when you say “The stuff she is saying is stuff I’ve heard from loads of non indian women but never an indian woman”.
A.Shah
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
I just finished reading all the comments, and even as I read them I can’t help but laugh at some of Som’s comments on Sherlyn’s quotes!
Comment by FloydRulez on 19 October 2007:
Disclaimar: My honest take at this. I apologize in advance if it makes people uncomfortable in any sense..
Using a ‘*’ isn’t going to change things, like say a “b*t*h” - but it somehow appears to be less ‘derogatory’, Isn’t it? I think we misuse this effect to a great deal. If one has to dissect some films, especially if it comes to ‘exploitation’ films, for example, let’s say “Grindhouse” and its metaphors. One had to refer to different implications in the film. One can’t help it. Isn’t this a place for matured cinephiles? However, referring someone (especially a star) with expletives could be done away with. Better if we moderate ‘em, and maintain the decorum and public forum etiquettes. Because that would only be judgmental and in bad taste. It qualifies as mudslinging and a personal abuse. But using such terms doesn’t make someone ‘lewd’, because the terms themselves are ’social contruct’. While one suggests that it’s sexist if we speak of a woman in the bad light(terms like ‘hussies’, ‘tart’, ‘whore’, etc), while a man regarded a ‘womanizer’ is not as derogatory. This is sexist. Blame the MCP structure, and we are inherently driven to believe ’sexual orientation’ is the morality test. That’s BS. Words like ‘bastard’, have always been regarded as ’sexist’ because the woman is put to the ultimate test yet again. I’m strongly against this, but at times, there is a need to define a character (like say, Depardieu in “1900″). A matured cinephile shouldn’t sound ’sexist’ while using such terms - that is agreed. However, if someone had to use that on me, it wouldn’t be a negative remark in my book. Even if a person’s sexual orientation is to be questioned, it doesn’t take away anything. BUT, If that was to be ridiculed, it’s definitely prejudiced and slanted.
Next up - Using a general term like ‘fuck’ is balanced. While p*ss*/c*nt/tw*t vs c*ck/d*ck/d*ng - but these are used in ‘vulgar’ sense (’vagina’ and ‘phallus’ are not vulgar), and quite rightly objected here. But there are many mainstream films which often have implications and are quite transparent with a need for the discourse on the same, and more to do with ’sexual inclination’ as such. Should we do away with such discussions as they are pornographic? I personally don’t find this to be not ’sexist’ and no, this is not offending in any way.
Comment by FloydRulez on 19 October 2007:
Playing a devil’s advocate again, If someone types ‘respectably’ here could be sexist, homophobic, or a chauvinist for all we know. Better not to get judgmental if someone looses their cool and hits back by instinct. In any case, the ‘individual’ and ‘individuality’ doesn’t exist. It’s a social construct, and I wouldn’t get judmental on the person, but deconstruct/dissect the ’setup’ on which he lives in. For example, it’s pretty cool to sound ‘homophobic’, and it’s a yuppie rule to sound ‘hip’. This hippie belief is quenched if one uses swearwords and prejudiced terms. So, there is no ‘You’ or ‘yourself’ here. You just put on a cloak at different places. My two paisa..
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Floyd, been reading your posts over the last few weeks..and you make a lot of sense!
Comment by nithi_s on 19 October 2007:
A.Shah..
Just one point I need to make … The first pic of Sherlyn is clearly visible even without clicking on it and the size is big.
So, do you intend to say that people who don’t like such posts should not try reading whats in it? Anyway my intention is to request everyone have some control of the topics discussed and words used!
About SP, if you know so much abt him, why do you get offended from what he says! The idea is to be keep unnecessary name calling away. A healthier discussion shouldn’t get personal.
Even, I have got upset with a certain member calling me fanatic. But, re-attacking with equally offending words is one thing that I do not want to do. Sorry about sounding like a moral sciene teacher.
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Nithi: But there is a way the pics can be posted so they don’t show on the main body of the page.
Agree on control of words used:-)
In regards to SP, he doesn’t offend me as much anymore, I do feel sorry for the guy..:-)
Nothing wrong with being a moral science teacher:-)
A.Shah
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Akshay–No one should have the problem with the ‘F’ word, coz more often than not, the word is used in a sense which is totally disconnected from it’s literal meaning. And I don’t think anyone is still getting the point Nithya was trying to make…I can go ahead and call you a dickhead right now for not calling CDI a classic
, followed by a smiley of course..but I highly doubt that can be called an insult. Someone can go ahead and call kareena a whore(that is r**di in Hindi) for ditching Shahid, that would still be okay. In fact, each and every comment in that thread is perfectly ok, as long as it’s not open to public ..but we do have some female members here, and it’s only considerate if we refrain from using ‘r**di’, ‘l**d’ or anything explicit or demeaning to women or even a particular woman in general. And now that Nithya has in fact voiced her opinions about this, it really makes sense to do away with it. As I said, it’s not a moral stand on anybody’s part, least of all mine :)..it’s respect for a fellow member, who happens to be a lady.
FloydRulez–Some strong points there :)..I agree. This debate, however, was more to do with what I have said above….not about right or wrong, or inconsistent standards for men and women, or morality stands and least of all pornografitti!
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Sunny: I don’t have a problem with the “F” word at all what so ever, I used it quiet often in posts “FUCKING COOL”, however I don’t like the words intended TOWARDS me i.e YOU’RE A FUCKING IDIOT:-).
But agree that some words shouldn’t be used on a public forum!
A.SHah
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Sunny “Sandhya–fairer, and might I add better, in every way actually…except for Math”
Actually Sunny not the case any more, now on the average girls are better than guys in Math too, so it would suffice to say that majority(a huge majority) of the Girls are better and definitely lot more nicer persons than us weird guys.
The above is not a sarcastic or tongue in cheek statement, this is something that I strongly believe in.
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
Jay: In all fairness, I don’t mind having this sort of interview once in a while. It does offer a perspective on female sexuality, and brings out lesser known facets, clearly because, as you say, not many women talk about it — though their ‘needs’ may not exactly be different from Sherlyn Chopra’s.
And there is some credence to what FloydRulez says, in the sense that a lot of times, women can end up being far more ’sexist’ in terms of labeling the likes of Shelyn, who choose to be explicit about their sexual preferences and are assertive in their physical demands.
I think that particular post and the ensuing threads had all sorts of comments and I would particularly laud SP there for standing by a woman’s prerogative to gratify herself physically, much like how a man would wish it to be.
The problem for me arises when a lot of men (and even women) tend to deliberately or through conditioning read the presence of a robust sexual appetite in a woman as ‘sluttish’ and ‘inappropriate’. If a man makes physical overtures, it’s natural and he’s merely responding to his throbbing hormones but if a woman expresses her physical desires, it is most often than not, read as desperation.
I think, my objection to some of the comments here, emerge from this deeply chauvanistic attitude that a several people carry with them.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Akshay–I know you don’t have a problem with that word. I was agreeing with you there, and I just added some of my points. I think there’s some problem with my writing, almost always it comes accross as if I was countering you, when in fact I was agreeing
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
On this topic what Nithya says makes a lot of sense when you look at it from a girl’s perspective because if my wife read this the first thing she would say is you guys are sick and what do you gain by talking like this, I try to tell her that this comments are in jest and that is the way guys talk, but she never gets convinced so I can understand where Nithya is coming from.
Personally, I don’t mind most of the comments and I am guilty of sometimes talking like that, but what to do guys are guys and sometimes we go overboard having fun.
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Well said Sandhya agree completely with what you just said.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Ravi–I’ll politely disagree with you on Math :)…actually Math is not the right word..what I meant was any sort of Analytics in general. Sandy/Nithya, please don’t kill me for this. ON all other counts, yeah, they beat us hands down! no questions asked. Strength(not physical power like men, but the ability to deal with pain,stress,tension in a much better way than men), loyalty, compassion, almost everything else.On Analytics, I still stand by my view :)..that’s not to say all women are bad at it, but on an average men are better.
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Well said Ravibhai!
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
“Personally, I don’t mind most of the comments and I am guilty of sometimes talking like that, but what to do guys are guys and sometimes we go overboard having fun.”
Very well said Ravi, and it holds true for all of us.
Comment by som on 19 October 2007:
first let me tell you, that i did not find anything offensive in that Maxim’s post.i liked the way Sherlyn went about the whole interview.we rarely come across such females in india we are outspoken and dont hesitate to reveal their sexual preferences.she was very honest and made it very clear what she expects from her male counterparts to be.
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
‘I can go ahead and call you a dickhead right now for not calling CDI a classic , followed by a smiley of course..but I highly doubt that can be called an insult’
Disagree. Might not be an insult, but it is definitely a road block to a discussion. The smiley is just there as a coverup IMO, why say ‘dickhead’ and follow with a smiley - is that double meaning? Also calling out someone like this is just plain wrong. For example, I am a Bobby basher and if I knew a Bobby fan, I’d not call him a dickhead for liking him, only I would like to know what it is s/he actually sees in him ! i.e. I cannot understand some peoples’ tastes BUT that doesn’t mean I’d start to downgrade them as people by insulting there choices ! Key word here is respecting an opinion.
‘The problem for me arises when a lot of men (and even women) tend to deliberately or through conditioning read the presence of a robust sexual appetite in a woman as ‘sluttish’ and ‘inappropriate’. If a man makes physical overtures, it’s natural and he’s merely responding to his throbbing hormones but if a woman expresses her physical desires, it is most often than not, read as desperation.
I think, my objection to some of the comments here, emerge from this deeply chauvanistic attitude that a several people carry with them.’
Sandy…I find it enlightening when a woman speaks out like Sherlyn. Nothing to do with desperation…but the point you address is a social one that is apparant in all societies.
If a man went into a club and hit on 20 women and got there numbers he’d be lauded by blokes ! If a female done the same, more often then not, she is considered ’sluttish’. But that is how society is currently setup ! And it really stems from the fact that there are very few Sherlyn type women who are crystal clear about there likes and dislikes and can go public on it !
Anyway - without meaning offense, if Sherlyn’s interview was actually given by a western person, someone like a friend I know in London, it would be more readibly ‘appropriate’. Because she is indian, it changes the dynamics of her comments. Shilpa when she was in big brother dodged all q’s relating to sex whereas local westerners were all openly discussing about it. Part of this dsagreement is related to culture and being someone who has grown up a traditional environment at home but having all my education in a western society I too have lived a double life of sorts. There are some things which I just cannot openly talk about at home or with cousins but can do with friends.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
som–I don’t think anyone here said they found Sherlyn’s interview offensive.
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
Jay: My objection is not at Sherlyn’s interview at all, though I do understand a lot of women may not be comfortable reading it..
Personally, I have no issues here. My beef is about some of the comments made there..and there’s no excuse about that.
Comment by som on 19 October 2007:
sunny: i suppose Nithya did not like that post about Sherlyn(the maxim pictures) and the comments followed after that.i guess she must have been offended by some of the comments we guys have made in that thread which might have forced her to post this write up.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Jayshah–That was an example first of all..I was not calling Akshay a dickhead there. It’s something like you meet a friend, give him tight pat on his back..and say kyun be ch***ye kya haal hai. I was just explaining a situation where words don’t actually mean what they’re supposed to.
Anyway, I don’t know why this is happening, as it happens in a lot of discussions. A simple thing like a fellow member asking for a little consideration and the others digging deep to find loopholes and arguments, discussion on ideological as well as philosohical standpoints, or plainly going off topic for God knows what. Everyone is free to post whatever he/she likes, as I’ve said in this thread repeatedly!, it’s not a sermon on morality, and neither is anyone judging anyone else here. The whole point is a little consideration for other’s views/feelings.
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
Anyway…I am the least bit qualified for a discussion on how men and women behave. I don’t understand women at all ! They drive me nuts ! Most of them do anyway. Especially the one’s I liked, they always drove me to do some really stupid things ! I have a bunch of emails and birthday cards and xmas cards I regret writing !
Sandy I understand. Can only say alot of that is just ‘boys being boys’ but maybe should tone down for NG’s good…
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
som–yes Som, that’s exactly what had happened.
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
To be honest, I have found NG to be one of the most open, liberal , progressive, pro-women forums. And it’s a largely underrated asset, we must be proud of.
Wouldn’t like the equilibrium to alter, that’s all..
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Jay : “! I have a bunch of emails and birthday cards and xmas cards I regret writing “—Lol! I know exactly what you mean…the embarrassing things we do;)!
Agree on toning it down..
A.Shah
Comment by som on 19 October 2007:
“Personally, I have no issues here. My beef is about some of the comments made there..and there’s no excuse about that.”
yes i do agree and i also held myself responsible for making such comments which i suppose should not have been done in this public forum.we guys as Ravi bhai rightly said go overboard sometimes when it comes to such kinda discussions.if atall the female members have been offended by those comments,i am extremely sorry for that and will see that i dont post such comments in the future.
Comment by nithi_s on 19 October 2007:
Thanks Ravi for seeing what I wrote in a girl’s POV.
On a different note, I am travelling to hometown this weekend. Can’t come online for a couple of days. Will surely miss the discussions in NG. Will get back only on Monday.
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
Yes Sandy. I think we are seeking perfection on these matters ! The standard is aready very high, but we are after Bradmanesque perfection !
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
Also, in a certain refreshing way, I find it curious that the likes of Sherlyn, are replicating male chauvinism and sexist stereotypes about women in their embrace of “raunch culture” and traditionally masculine attributes.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
som–take a bow
bravo! pal.
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
Re “if at all the female members have been offended by those comments,i am extremely sorry for that and will see that i dont post such comments in the future.”
Yaar Som, don’t make me look like a WCS –women chauvinist sow!
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
I guess that means no more “PICK YOUR HOTTIE” competition Jay:P..though I know you always wanted Rakhi Bahen:D
A.Shah
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Though I started that post with an apology to begin with, and even promised topless pictures of Salman Khan and Hrithik Roshan handpicked by my sister upfront:)!
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Sandy–sow!…LMAO…he he..amazing
Comment by som on 19 October 2007:
“Yaar Som, don’t make me look like a WCS –women chauvinist sow!”
no notatall sandy.i now feel guilty of making that last comment in that thread which i really believe was not proper and suitable for this public platform like NG.it was something i guess went liitle far.
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Agree Jay and Akshay, girls unfortunately have the power to make us do lot of things which normally we would not do.
I used to always think that man I cannot understand the girls, but after spending the last 14 years with my wife and 10 years with my little girl, I have a better perspective of the fairer sex, they are lot more nicer , more sensible and more caring than we guys can ever be.
My wife talks to her sister everyday( I keep asking her what was so new everyday to talk about) and I speak like once a month with my brother and that too after the first minute I start asking “what else”.
But, one thing is for sure guys tend to have majority of the fun before marriage(it is changing now) and definitely after marriage.
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
Well certainly you have a club of actresses who are capable of making such an interview and some that are not. Can you imagine someone like Rani giving an interview like that ? It’d be all over tv and she would be casgated ! Her image would be killed. Actors/actresses by in large give interviews in line with what their image is. Sherlyn probably represents a sexbomb type image who is very open to such publicity. Also she is unknown and not so popular, so giving such an ‘out there’ interview gives her some fame for a few mins.
Comment by som on 19 October 2007:
“I guess that means no more “PICK YOUR HOTTIE” competition”
Akshay: yes i also think so.we have to restrict those things to emails only.
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Som, you cannot be perfect bud, you just showed that you are human by making those comments, but you are a nice guy with a level head and nothing you say is over board at all.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
“My wife talks to her sister everyday( I keep asking her what was so new everyday to talk about) and I speak like once a month with my brother and that too after the first minute I start asking “what else”.
Man!! I’ve been married for only a year, and I’m already going crazy with the phone conversations. Seriously..Sandy/Nithya…what do you guys talk about???
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
“I guess that means no more “PICK YOUR HOTTIE” competition”
What we are not going to have that? Have a decent dressed hottie competition.
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Ravi: Well worded,and on the latter..sure why not, I might do a Pick Your Hottie in Desi Attire;)!
Women and phones will always remain a mystery much like why women always go to the bathroom in pairs..
A.Shah
Comment by som on 19 October 2007:
“you cannot be perfect bud, you just showed that you are human by making those comments”
Ravi Bhai:yeah that was quite natural on my part to make such comments but i did forget that there are some female members here at NG who may get offended.its just not here at NG ,even some of my female frens have problem when we guys talk something liitle weird relating to sex and similar stuffs.
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
Not undermining the likes of Sherlyn, but I find it so much more exciting to make love to a man’s brain than his body. hehe
Again, it could be a case of ignorance being bliss!
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
“much like why women always go to the bathroom in pairs..”lol…I’ve been told about some of them…but not gonna disclose ‘em here..he he
Sandy–don’t get your hopes high given the widespread belief in the adage that a man carries his brain in his ……
, but then maybe you’re on the right track …lol.
Comment by FloydRulez on 19 October 2007:
“And there is some credence to what FloydRulez says, in the sense that a lot of times, women can end up being far more ’sexist’ in terms of labeling the likes of Shelyn, who choose to be explicit about their sexual preferences and are assertive in their physical demands.
I think that particular post and the ensuing threads had all sorts of comments and I would particularly laud SP there for standing by a woman’s prerogative to gratify herself physically, much like how a man would wish it to be.
The problem for me arises when a lot of men (and even women) tend to deliberately or through conditioning read the presence of a robust sexual appetite in a woman as ‘sluttish’ and ‘inappropriate’. If a man makes physical overtures, it’s natural and he’s merely responding to his throbbing hormones but if a woman expresses her physical desires, it is most often than not, read as desperation.”
- Absolutely Sandy. As I said, it’s a social construct over generations. From prehistoric civilization to modern day religious inclinations plays a part here. It runs subconsiously that Women are inclined to think of ‘gratification’ as a despicable act (and women themselves are retrograde for the bad) as against men who have their hormonal instincts to blame. It’s a case of inhibition. The morality of ‘desperation’ is the probably the most complicated of the lot. Better to dissect the scenario and hence be more objective than relegate to subjectivity. The deconstruction (deciphering how progressive/regressive is a part of which) is an interesting course of study in itself.
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
‘they are lot more nicer , more sensible and more caring than we guys can ever be.
My wife talks to her sister everyday( I keep asking her what was so new everyday to talk about) and I speak like once a month with my brother and that too after the first minute I start asking “what else”.’
DISAGREE. No way in hell is a girl ever going to be more nicer, sensible or caring then me ! No way hose ! In fact I can safely say I am all these more than most the girls I know LOL !
On the second comment, would put that down to women’s propensity to gossip and talk is a lot more than a mans ! And doesn’t mean one care’s any less or more ! Plus what do they talk about ? My mum does this and in all honesty she spends one hour discussing something that can be said in two mins ! Lack of efficiency in my book !
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
jayshah–all fair points and valid arguments too….lol…my beliefs are shaken now
Comment by FloydRulez on 19 October 2007:
Of course, not to sound too freudian or senile yet again. I find this excerise of deconstruction be more constructive. This applies to films from “Aval appidi thaan” to “Jules et Jim”, Mahesh bhatt to KB. We could discuss about ‘em and the digressive non-NG material changes into a more relevant film-related discourse.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Actually even I don’t agree completely with the ‘caring’ part. Yes, they are infinitely more caring than men when it comes to their parents, siblings,close friends,children, close relatives, but on a broader picture I feel men indulge in general acts of goodness and kindness far more than women do. I for one, have never ever seen helping someone cross the road, or helping someone change their flat tyre, or offer to carry a senior citizen’s luggage etc. What I mean to say is, if a man is actually as caring as he should NOT be(according to conventional wisdom) then there are chances that he’ll be far more caring on a general level than most caring women. The intensity with which women care for their loved ones though…is something which men can never! match.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
**seen them**
Comment by akshay shah on 19 October 2007:
Whoa, some superb points there Sunny! “What I mean to say is, if a man is actually as caring as he should NOT be(according to conventional wisdom) then there are chances that he’ll be far more caring on a general level than most caring women”
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Thanks Akki bhai
Comment by Elvis on 19 October 2007:
Hmmm.Interesting discussion and fair points.
Comment by nithi_s on 19 October 2007:
jayshah,
Your last comment proves that you certainly don’t understand women!
Being emotional, sensitive and moody got something to do with Estrogen. Men might be sensitive too but the female sensitivity lies in a different sphere. Yes, at the end of the day females are a probablity a little more selfish and want security more than anything else.
But yes, women do have a tendency to gossip. However, there can be garrulous men too. Thats got nothing to do with inefficieny but its just a character trait.
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Good points Sunny, but I did not mean that guys are not caring at all, I was just saying that girls are lot more that’s all.
For all the examples that you gave me unfortunately in my case if I an my wife were walking and we saw something like that, my wife would react and help that person or ask me to help the person even before the thought crosses my mind.
You wait Sunny till you are married for a little longer time and you will think back and say, yup there was this dickhead called Ravi at NG who said all this things about the girls and looks like he is right on the money.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Nithya–I think Jayshah used the word ‘inefficiency’ in humor..I don’t think he believes that
and well said on the Estrogen thing.
Comment by Elvis on 19 October 2007:
Women are interesting species.They have their own rules and you gotta play by them.Also the rules are subject to change from moment to moment.What was valid a few minutes ago may not be valid any longer.Never fall into the trap of thinking you have understood them completely or their needs and desires as they will turn that belief on its head in a moment.There are only two rules of operation here:
1.Women are always right
2.When you think they are wrong,look at rule no.1
They make the rules and they can change them and break them.We just obey the rules.
And funny thing is ,I am fine with this!
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Ravi–I absolute believe in and agree to everything you said on women Ravi bhai. I was just blabbing there..he he. Actually, most of the times, when we hear this kinda conversation..and when someone says women are caring, women are kind..it’s not meant to highlight the qualities of women but rather hint at the shortcomings of men
. That’s why I just added all those points. Yes, I absolutely believe that women are superior to men in every conceiveable way..but men are not that bad as they’re made out to be 
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Nithya, Jay does understand women.
But, the thing that he does not understand about them is how come they don’t fall for him when he hits on them. He is more loving, caring and sensible than all of them combined, plus he sends them a lot of emails and letters which normally he would not do, that is what he does not understand about them. Right, Jay?
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Well said Rajen bhai, are you a DKD or a talking quack(Psychiatrist)?
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Elvis–brilliant!,you just summarized the story of every man’s life :)..and yeah I’m fine with those rules too.
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
The desire to be loved and cared for, is unsatiable in a woman. Sadly, most men don’t stand up to this test.
They remain just spoilt little boys at any given age!
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Rajen kaun hai?
Comment by Elvis on 19 October 2007:
Sunny,
that what I have been asking for last two weeks-wHO IS THIS Rajen guy????????
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Sandhya “They remain just spoilt little boys at any given age!”
That is exactly what my wife says about me, that she has three kids , first my 10 year old daughter, second our 5 year old son and the youngest me.
Comment by Arun on 19 October 2007:
” Yes, they are infinitely more caring than men when it comes to their parents, siblings,close friends,children, close relatives, but on a broader picture I feel men indulge in general acts of goodness and kindness far more than women do”
Very well said, Sunny!
Men are pretty caring as well, it’s just that they prefer not to express it much.
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Sunny ” Yes, they are infinitely more caring than men when it comes to their parents, siblings,close friends,children, close relatives, but on a broader picture I feel men indulge in general acts of goodness and kindness far more than women do”
Yes, Sunny you are right by the time they finish caring for their parents, siblings,close friends,children, close relatives they do not have much time left to care for the rest of the population.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Sandy–It’s not as if men don’t satnd up to this test Sandy. IMO passion is something which women overrate too much, and that is THE main reason for most women’s dissatisfactions. A man just cannot run after you with a rose in his hand, praising your beautiful eyes and lips every minute(oh! how much I’ve done this in college)
, with time some things don’t remain so verbal and physical as they used to be…what remains is a strong sense of companionship, bonding, trust, respect and an even greater love for each other. I think this should be valued more, but most women seem to be looking for the passion whenever they desire(i’m not saying all of them, but there’s certainly a sizeable lot). So I don’t think it’s the failure of men as such(of course, many men are outright pigs, all those cheaters with roving eyes), it’s more like expecting something which one really shouldn’t and try and find the silver linings.
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
Elvis & others: Talking of gender rules, here’s something I find incredibly funny.
It’s written by a man who seems to know women and their quirks quite well…
The Guy rules:
We always hear “the rules” from the female side. Now here are the
rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note… these are
all numbered “1″…ON PURPOSE!
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
2. Crying is blackmail.
3. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do
not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just
say it!
4. “Yes” and “No” are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
5. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s
what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
6. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
7. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In
fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
8. If you won’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t expect
us to act like soap opera guys.
9. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.
10. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the
ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
11. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
12. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
13. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have
no idea what mauve is.
14. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
15. If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” we will act like
nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.
16. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
17. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine…Really.
18. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
19. You have enough clothes.
20. You have too many shoes.
21. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
22. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like
camping.
Comment by Elvis on 19 October 2007:
Its a women’s world.We just happen to live in it.And life would be pointless without them.Love them,cherish them,spoil them.Never berate,disrespect or insult them.They are pretty strong and can probably do without us but we certainly would be lost and lonely without them.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
yeah even my wife calls me bachha
drives me mad with this.
Ravi bhaiyya..aap mere peeche pad gaye :). I’m just trying to hold the taraazu from completely touching ground on the female side..that’s all.
Comment by Elvis on 19 October 2007:
Sandy,
Thats bang on target.Agree with everything except rule 21.I think these should be tattoed somewhere on a woman’s body at birth.Naah,actually if they start doing these,the fun would go out.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
I’ve read this long ago Sandy, and yeah I agree with almost every rule in there. That I can’t follow my own rules at home is another matter
Comment by sandy on 19 October 2007:
I know Sunny, everyone has probably read this already. This is just for those who missed it.
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
Ok Sunny, lo you are free. By the way thanks for fighting for us guys rights.
Comment by Elvis on 19 October 2007:
In the same vein but a little unrelated 28 rules of manhood.Apologise if you have already seen them before or if it offends anybody!
The 28 Rules of Manhood
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss’s car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into “The Crying Game”.
(e) When she is using her teeth.
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5: If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.
6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy’s fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy’s birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy’s choice.
8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who’s playing.
10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she’s officially your girlfriend.
11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you’re sunning on a tropical beach… and it’s delivered by a topless model and only when it’s free.
12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the balls
13: Unless you’re in prison, never fight naked.
14: Friends don’t let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
15: If a man’s fly is down, that’s his problem, you didn’t see anything.
16: Women who claim they “love to watch sports” must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.
18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that’s just greedy.
19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you’d better be talking about his choice of beer.
20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she’s withholding sex pending your response.
21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
b) C’mon, give me one more! Harder!
c) Another set and we can hit the showers!
22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.
24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly “just a friend” have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you’re feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.
25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.
26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
27: The girl who replies to the question “What do you want for Christmas?” with “If you loved me, you’d know what I want!” gets an Xbox. End of story.
28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men’s Gymnastics. Ever. We’ve all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:
~ GUTS is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, “are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?”
~ BALLS is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the bottom and having the balls to say, “You’re next!”
We hope this clears up any confusion,
The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
“They are pretty strong and can probably do without us but we certainly would be lost and lonely without them.”
I disagree….I’d like to believe my wife could not do wihout me :). I mean I had given 2 years of college wooing her, then 2 years way from her in phirang land, a couple of years making a stable career..all the time loving her missing her..wanting to finally marry her.NO, I don’t believe she could do without me, nor could any woman who truly loves any man.
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
‘jayshah,
Your last comment proves that you certainly don’t understand women! ‘
Nithi it was all tongue in cheek…but as Rajen said…you are right !
‘Right, Jay?’
Ravi indeed so. I understand women but don’t like getting screwed over ! And have been done so a few times before !
Comment by Sunny on 19 October 2007:
Elvis–the GUTS vs BALLS bit is hilarious!! LOL
Comment by Ravi on 19 October 2007:
I like and agree with most if not all of the rules Rajen bhai.
Comment by Paddy on 19 October 2007:
I would not get into the gender discussion (LOL!!), but I do feel that such pictures should be put as a link. Since when we access the site from office and other public places, it is a tad bit embarassing..:-)
As for the comments…… dont mind them… though some self-censorship is good..but am fine… Hope u guys understand.
Comment by Paddy on 19 October 2007:
I would not get into the gender discussion (LOL!!), but I do feel that such pictures should be put as a link. Since when we access the site from office and other public places, it is a tad bit embarassing..:-)
As for the comments…… dont mind them… though some self-censorship is good..but am fine… Hope u guys understand.
Comment by rks on 19 October 2007:
JS:”I am the least bit qualified for a discussion on how men and women behave.”
call Elvis - the Teacher :).
JS:”On the second comment, would put that down to women’s propensity to gossip and talk is a lot more than a mans !”
My wife and friend’s wife spent 2-3 hours in discussing what cloths and jewelry to wear for this weekend party and I can see the happiness from their faces. At end they concluded they should do this more often
FloydRulez : Some good posts.
Ravi:”My wife talks to her sister everyday( I keep asking her what was so new everyday to talk about) and I speak like once a month with my brother and that too after the first minute I start asking “what else”.”
Comment by satyam on 19 October 2007:
haven’t read the comments but what post is being referred to here?
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
‘Elvis - the Teacher’
LOL Good one rks. Actually sounds like a name for a porno film.
Comment by jayshah on 19 October 2007:
Sherlyn Chopra MAXIM pictures post !